Butterflies

I haven't blogged for a week or so, and that is because the British contingent have arrived. 14 of my very closest friends and family are installed in some very nice villas just down the road.

There is also the small matter that I am getting married tomorrow.

I haven't really felt nerves at all, although I've had some peaks of stress this week trying to organise people.  But today is 24 hours til d-day, and the butterflies are definitely in residence.

My dress is ready and waiting...

...and we have a big pile of stuff ready to be transported to Clearwater Beach in preparation. I don't think I realised how much work a wedding actually is until about 5 days ago. 

My main obsession, however, is the weather. Current forecast is about 20c with a 20% chance of rain. I think 20c is better than today's 26 when you are wearing a big old dress, but I'm just hoping the showers hold off for the 90 minutes we will be outside at 4pm tomorrow...

Anyway, this is just a short entry, cos lots to do. And to say that, given that I will be on sort-of honeymoon next week ('sort-of' because we are staying at a Disney hotel and there will still be 14 Brits in town!), I'm going to be out of action for a week or so. But don't worry - I'll be back :)

Homesickness

I wanted to write a bit about homesickness, but I've waited until a day when I am not feeling particularly homesick, because I don't want to get into a "England is amazing/America sucks" type rant. I absolutely have times when I do feel that way, and that's part of being aware of where you are from, but in the grand scheme of things it's not really fair.


In the weeks running up to me moving over here, I warned Jason that I could spend my first three weeks just wanting to turn tail and get on the next flight back to Manchester. Because that is what happened when I came to Orlando for my Disney College Programs. I spent the first three weeks thinking 'what the hell have I done?' and many tearful phone calls to my long-suffering mother were made. Then I would do something that was awesome - I think on my second college program it was a backstage BBQ at the Magic Kingdom where I went to disco in the middle of the day and did the Cha Cha Slide with Lilo & Stitch - and suddenly I would be OK.


But those times were very different, because I knew that - eventually - I would be heading home. 


This is the fourth time I have moved abroad - I spent 9 months living in Paris and this is attempt number 3 in Florida - and the one thing I can tell you is that immersion in a completely different culture definitely makes you more aware of where you are from. It's a great privilege, in a way, because you get to teach people which stereotypes are right and which are wrong - yes we drink a lot of tea, no I am not on personal terms with the Queen. 


I think one thing that worries me the most is losing touch with British life. Stupid little things like who got voted off X Factor, who is presenting the Ten O' Clock News on BBC1, and how much a bar of Dairy Milk costs. But I am trying to be pragmatic, and find my own way to stay in touch. With technology today, it is really, really easy to keep in touch with what is going on back home. It's just a shame that the major TV channels in the UK have blocked their online streaming to international IP addresses - but I'm trying to find a way round it.


I have found my own ways to express my Britishness too, which largely involves occasionally exercising my right to slag off various American ways of doing things and act superior. Oh, I may not be right, of course, but it bloody well makes me feel better. A key example is happening right now with this whole Prince William engagement thing. Watching NBC Nightly News earlier, the presenter referred to William as the 'future King of England', to which my response (to noone in particular, given I'm sat here by myself) was, "it's future King of Great Britain actually, jackass!" Now I am watching the BBC coverage on BBC America and Jeremy Paxman, anchor of a nightly news debate show called Newsnight, is on, and I feel all is right with the world.


(Actually, Jeremy Paxman is a bit of an arrogant tosser, but I am choosing to forget that for a bit. It's all about the rose-tinted glasses, so long as you know when to take them off.)


Of course I miss my family and my friends terribly, and that comes and goes when you least expect it. Last night I was perfectly happy watching Jerry Maguire, and I used the expression 'square eyes' when chatting to Jason. It made me feel terribly homesick out of the blue, because my mum used to use that expression all the time when I was a kid.


Fortunately, I have a great man who loves me enough to realise that my homesickness and my love for him are not mutually exclusive, and is there with a big hug whenever I need it.


I guess I've realised that the key to surviving is realising that homesickness is allowed, and that it will pass. And picking up the phone to my mum, dad, or best friends, is the best medicine when I am feeling blue.


But this week I am extra lucky, because most of my friends and family are arriving this weekend for the wedding. So I will get a big piece of home for the next 2 weeks - and I can't wait!

The wonderful world of seating plans and the CIS

I realised that I have been writing this blog for a few weeks now and have studiously failed to mention the entire reason I'm even in America, which is that I'm getting married.


The following statement is not going to be a shock to anyone who knows me, but for the uninitiated - I am a terrible bride. I am getting married a few years earlier than I had in mind in my life plan (which just proves that forward planning is pointless), due to a small thing called the Atlantic combined with immigration law, and this also makes me the first person in my circle of friends to be doing so. End result - I have been to 2 weddings in the past ten years,  can barely remember either (and one of them was my dad's!) and therefore really have no idea what's going on most of the time.


We've been planning this wedding for over a year, and now it is less than 3 weeks away, which is a very scary (but exciting!) prospect. I am having to deal with things that the sensible side of my brain is rejecting out of hand, saying 'who gives a toss anyway?'. Key example - the seating plan. Wasn't going to bother, but then I realised that it could easily end up being a trans-Atlantic school disco situation - all the Brits on one side of the room, and all the Americans on the other. So I have lost 2-3 hours of my life to picking where people shall sit. Will this person get on with that person? Do these people have anything in common whatsoever? It's the sort of thing you hope you don't have to think about but in reality you do.


Fortunately I haven't turned into bridezilla yet and am taking the apparent total disappearance off the face of the planet of our ceremony musician relatively well. This is a good thing, because on top of all the standing wedding planning I am also having to prepare my green card application.


Up to this point, we have given the United States Citizenship and Immigration Service $1200 to get me into the country - but that does not allow me to stay here. My visa, called a K-1, allows me to enter the US for a maximum of 90 days to marry a US citizen (a specific one, by the way, not just anyone!). Once Jason and I are hitched, we then have to file what is called an Adjustment of Status application - in other words, apply for my green card. This is what allows me to live and work in the US on a (semi-)permanent basis.


Applying for the green card costs another $1000, and even then it is only 'conditional residency'. It's a temporary permanent resident card. I know, me neither. So then in 2 years time we will have to fork out another $500 to make it a standard 10-year green card.


All of this paperwork is also extremely complicated and requires a lot of supporting evidence. The good news is that we are pretty much becoming experts on visa paperwork, so each thing we have to do is taking a little less time every time. 


That's a very short explanation of a very long and tedious process. But one that will be very worth it in the end.


But for now it's back to seating plans, song lists and guestbooks. Assuming I need any of these - my husband to be is currently on his stag do, so we'll wait and see if he gets back in one piece!

Food Wars!

I have been inspired by Miss Nicola Warrington to talk about food (although, as I'm going to the gym straight after, I'm hoping it's not going to make me too hungry!). Nic posted a Lonely Planet article on her Facebook comparing American and British food, so I thought I'd add my tuppence worth.

One of the things I was sad to leave behind at home was the food. British food frequently gets a bad rap; when I was teaching in Paris, I asked some of my students what they already knew about the UK and the food in particular - the answer was almost universally 'pudding'. What does 'pudding' even mean by itself anyway? It either needs the word Yorkshire in front of or some kind of sweet treat, e.g. chocolate pudding.

This leads me nicely on to what I proudly consider, as an adopted Yorkshirewoman, to be one of the gems of the British culinary world - the aforementioned Yorkshire pudding.

Glorious gravy bowls made of batter - traditionally with roast beef and loads of veg, but just as good when you're paying music festival prices, but get a foot-wide Yorkshire filled with sausages, mash and gravy. And people say British cuisine sucks. Nom.

I will admit, however, that British food in the strictest sense - i.e. of British origin - isn't exactly varied. Roast dinners, sandwiches, meat and two veg, and, erm, that's about it. But what we do do, extremely well might I add, is embrace other countries' cuisine and make it our own. There is no better example of this than curry.

Basically, if you haven't had a good curry before, you haven't lived. Curry is actually considered a high-risk food for nut allergy sufferers, so the fact I still go to balti houses back home on a regular basis should tell you something about how good it is. Standard side dish requirements are pilau rice and naan bread.

I am going to get on to American food in a second, but let me just say one more word in support of British cuisine: Cadbury's. Enough said.

Now American food also gets a bad rap from us Brits and I'm going to be honest and say I agree with a lot of it. Fresh fruit and veg is very expensive in supermarkets - when a red pepper is $1.20 for one or you can get a burger, fries and a drink from Maccy D's for around $2.50, you can see why there is a weight problem in America. A lot of the food is very processed and frequently fried. When I lived here in 2008 I put on a stone over 6 months, because it was easier (and cheaper) to just eat fast food the whole time.

But (and this is a big but) - if you know where to go for what you want, you can get some truly awesome food over here. In the midst of all the fried crap, American salads are unbeatable anywhere. I had a chinese chicken salad from Earl of Sandwich today that was out of this world. All the ingredients are always really fresh and the dressings are delicious - just ask for them on the side, otherwise those nice ingredients might get drowned.

In addition, I must make room for the humble steak. It is blasphemy for a carnivore to visit the United States and not have a steak. As it happens, I had a steak last week that made it into the Top 2 of my 'best steaks ever' list. It was at California Grill, which is the restaurant on the 15th floor of Disney's Contemporary resort and overlooks the Magic Kingdom. I had the filet steak with loaded mash potato and broccolini and it. was. DIVINE. (image  below is similar but not exactly what we had)

Lastly, there's the variety. British food also has great variety and is certainly healthier in terms of what you can get on the go, but the sheer availability in the States is mind-boggling. Many places are open past midnight, up to 4 or 5 in the morning, or even 24 hours (post-dancing pancakes at IHOP at 4am anyone?). Steak, chili, Mexican, Chinese, roast beef sandwiches, and yes, McDonalds et al.

However, for me, UK still wins on this one, and it's not just because I'm biased. There is one irrefutable reason why British food is better than American food.

Only one city in the entire United States has a Nandos.

My first encounter with American healthcare (kind of)

Today I had to go to the doctors. It's only been 12 days since I got here, and already my body is falling apart.

Fortunately, I, as with many other people, am well aware of my medical inadequacies (and propensity to end up in casualty/the ER). I am not covered on Jason's work health insurance from work until we get married, so I bought special 'non-immigrant visa' health insurance (it's surprising how easy it was to find!) that will cover me until the big day.

I will not spend much time on the American healthcare system, as I tend to get my knickers in a twist in absolute frustration, and I don't want to go on a big rant here. All I will say is that back home, socialised healthcare is king. The NHS is free at the point of use (although we effectively pre-pay through fairly hefty taxes) and prescriptions are a fixed price. It's not perfect - it's billions of pounds in debt and waiting lists for non-urgent procedures are long - but in my opinion, as someone who's life the NHS has saved on numerous occasions, it is a precious thing. So that means life here in the USA is going to take some getting used to.

I do know the value of having good insurance here. When I first worked at Disney, I skimped on my insurance premium and regretted it when I ended up in the Florida Hospital ER with an allergic reaction. $3000 later, I vowed to always be covered and to check the details!

Anyway, back to the present. I went to an urgent care walk-in facility that I had checked with my insurers was covered (after about an hour of poring over the details of coverage and deciding that nothing made any sense at all). The first thing the receptionist did was say my insurance wasn't accepted. She got very snotty when I begged to differ. Fortunately (after I had been proved right), the nurse and doctor I saw were much nicer. The visit cost me $50, which as a Brit I found quite painful, but was much less than I expected.

The effects of a private healthcare system were evident and quite amusing to me. There was a TV in the exam room and the doctor took all his notes on a touchscreen laptop. Weird...

Next stop was Wal-Mart to pick up my prescriptions. I do not have prescription insurance at the moment so I was dreading this moment, but as it happened both the drugs I needed were only $4 each - and that is cheaper than they would have been on the NHS where all prescriptions are a flat rate of about 7.50. Wal-Mart and other large companies running pharmacies have the buying power these days to buy generic versions of major branded drugs, so the bills for common drugs isn't (always, at least) as astronomical as the stereotype would suggest. The lady who gave me my drugs was also a pillock, but I'm just going to put that down to her working at Wal-Mart.

So a mixed bag of experiences today. Hopefully as I start to learn how it all works they will get better.

And by the way, still being tormented by the bug bites. The only way I could sleep last night was when my long-suffering boy put baking soda paste and a bag of ice on my feet. I am, most definitely, a sexy lady.

A mid-term survival guide

I'm sitting at the breakfast bar writing this as a desperate attempt to distract myself from scratching my feet.


I don't know what I did to upset the insects of Florida, but they seem to find me very tasty. Sat on my friend SB's porch last night waiting for trick-or-treaters to come round, some of the state's tinier and more irritating residents decided to have a feast on the one bit of me I missed with bug spray - my tootsies. I have bites in-between my toes, for God's sake, while everyone else is bite free!! If you ask me there's some serious injustice happening here.


I am also trying to ignore the TV because I am being bombarded with advertising that might as well have been written in Greek for all the sense it makes to me. For those of you that don't know, tomorrow is the mid-term elections here in the USA, so all the different candidates for Florida are advertising like mad on TV, radio, and billboards.


I am not going to go into any ideological detail here, because one of my main rules in life is 'never discuss politics or religion - it just gets messy'. But to position a bit, I'm a bit of an ideological liberal - not in a deeply political, I-know-every-last-detail-of-policy kind of way, but in a 'can't we all just get along?' kind of way. So in the cut-throat and (I don't think it's unreasonable to say) fairly right-leaning world of American politics, I often feel a bit at sea.


Plus, I'm British, so I am used to all our political advertising being heavily controlled - political broadcasts have to be clearly announced as such before and after the broadcast; they tend to come immediately after the news and that's about the only time; and there has to be a balance of representation across all the terrestrial channels (so for instance, the BBC can't only show Labour party political broadcasts, ITV can't only show Conservative broadcasts, etc.).


Over here, with the elections happening tomorrow, virtually every ad I have seen has been for one candidate or another (as I understand it, if you can pay for it, you get the airtime, although they have to be clearly marked as political too). Now I've got to be honest, I have absolutely no bloody idea what anyone is talking about. What is Amendment 4? Amendment 5? What did so-and-so do that was so awful?


You don't need to understand American politics to get the gist of all these adverts though. It just all seems a bit - well - like mud-slinging. Every commercial I have seen and heard has focused on slagging off one of the other candidates, portraying them as evil people, without ever really getting into the detail of why you should vote for that person and what they would actually do in office. It isn't just one side doing this either - Republicans, Democrats, and independents are all as bad as each other.


I'm not saying that British politics is above all this - they all go in for a bit of mud-slinging every once in a while. It's just not so...how to put it...vicious. Not that I have a vote in this country, but if I did I'm not sure I'd use it - just because they all seem as bad as each other.


I said this was a mid-term survival guide, and so it is. And the one way to survive is - ignore it. That's my plan, anyway!!


As this has all been a bit serious I'm going to sign off this post with something more light-hearted. Saturday was my very bestest friend's birthday party back in London and I was a bit down in the dumps that I couldn't be there. But my best man, Andy, (yes I have a best man, deal with it) set up a Skype web conference and I attended as a 'virtual' guest - including playing virtual ring of fire! 

It was the best virtual birthday party I've ever attended :)